Should I Give An Ultimatum to Get Him To Commit?

Can you just imagine how many frustrated women have, or thought about giving the ultimatum speech..since the beginning of marriages?

Your guy basically telling you "I love you.. but.. I'm not ready", "bla bla bla," just ain't working for ya is it?

An ultimatum equals a threat and you're not the first girl and not by a long shot will you be the last to ponder this prerogative.

So many women get fed up and frustrated with the waiting for a proposal...that they're willing to risk everything in the relationship, or stick around after he says no and lose all their credibility and equality with their partner.

This scenario is especially common in long distance relationships which, for obvious reasons, are frustrating enough.

By presenting the all or nothing option.. women don't have the clue that this will most likely kill the relationship..it's simply too much pressure for boyfriends..and who wants to be threatened? This is nothing more than a control game.

There is a slim chance it could work...if he gave some clues previously that he would be willing to take things to the next level.. BUT...are ya ready to pack your bags? Better yet..you should probably already have them packed..because even though it will strengthen your point with your guy... he'll probably tell you not to let the door slam on your way out.

Something that might play out better than near certain relationship suicide would be to stop seeing him and sexing him. If your living together that is going to be a tough thing to do...but.. read on....You could give him a thorough explanation by telling him that although you love him you don't want to ruin the friendship you've had all this time...tell him that you understand he doesn't want to commit but that's not the best thing for you..because you don't want to be in love with someone who doesn't want to commit.. and you're afraid you might lose respect for him.

By working that angle the only one pondering is your boyfriend...you gave him a choice without it being an ultimatum. This results in much better possibilities...he doesn't feel threatened...yet he is challenged to look at how he feels about you and commitment. He'll also now realize that you're fully independent without him...it gives him also a chance to miss you.

Now he can decide if all the benefits are not worth the commitment and move on...

If he decides they are...then he'll work on his commitment and set a date or map out a plan.

If he leaves...he can come back because realized he messed up, he truly loves you and wants a second chance.

If he moves on...of course it will hurt...but you will also know his feelings...and you won't be wasting more time.

The bottom line for either of these strategies is that you better get yourself ready for the truth whatever that may be...be ready to act on his response.